February 2006

You are currently browsing the monthly archive for February 2006.

Finally.

2/28/2006 in Happenings | 1 comment

I’m home, but for how long?

February.

2/9/2006 in Lamenting | 1 comment

Let’s rearrange
I wish you were a stranger I could disengage
Say that we agree and then never change
Soften a bit until we all just get along
But that’s disregard
Find another friend and you discard
As you lose the argument in a cable car
Hanging above as the canyon comes between

–The Fray, Over My Head (Cable Car)

I found myself browsing the numbers on my cellphone. And maybe it was the low afternoon that was dragging me down, but I felt hollow and frail today. I kept forgetting pieces of me–charts, notes, clipboard–all over clinic. I drove, and the highway seemed to be stretched too thin. The wind was going to be blow me over. Everything was an echo. Eddy, darling, where are you?

Today, I was a fraud. The smile on my face was porcelain and painted on. My hellos were Xeroxed. You should have seen me. You could have saved me. I wondered how my hands found the right words to scribble. My head didn’t. By the time the ink was dry, my thoughts were empty, and I was ready to move on, move on, move on and find what more there was. Today just wasn’t enough.

I’ve been hiding behind my plastic frames, waiting to disappear. And someday, when the world opens up to swallow me whole, will you still remember?